October 4, 2006

• Before we go on, here is a quick video of what we were wearing the previous night:
  

  
  

   So after a few hours of napping, Dave gets up and decides that he is going to go out and explore.  I decide to sleep for 30 minutes, and then do the same.  I decided to go to the mall, and then to the Metropolitan Cathedral of Christ the King.  The signs to the place were not the easiest to follow, and it resided at the top of a long hill.  Fortunately, I don't have much to type, because I took video:
  

  
  

  During my excursion, I also decided to go to McDonalds.  Dave and I would talk about it later:

  
  

  Me:  I went to McDonalds for lunch.
  Dave:  How was it?
  Me:  It was awesome.  I bit into a Big Mac, and I think I could hear "America the Beautiful" playing.
  Dave: Did fireworks go off, too.?
  Me:  Oh yeah. And then some bald eagles flew by, and a Native American sat down next to me and shed a single tear.

  
  

  Our plan for Sunday night was to stay out all night, and then go back to the hotel and grab our bags, which were already packed, since our plane took off at 5 in the morning.  So we went out to get some dinner, and I decided to interrogate Dave for the previous nights events.

  
  

  Like I said in the last post, a cougar had latched onto Dave.  Apparently, he was a cougar magnet that night (explained later).  Anyway, aside from the fact that the "mother hen" of the bachelorette party didn't like that Dave had been grabbed up by one of the girls, and the fact that Dave and the cougar (I was going to type girl, but I'm sure that's misleading) essentially isolated themselves from the group, but still remained near the party.  Something that I forgot to mention is that in my initial break through, I was so well received that the girls gave me their real names, instead of the fake names that they were wearing on their name tags, such as "Horny Helen", etc, starting with the bride, whose name was Nikki.

  
  

  Anyway, at some point, the cougar takes Dave back to her place:

  
  

  Dave:  So she asks me "would you like some coffee?" and I say no.  She then proceeds to go get me coffee.
  Me: Weird.
  Dave:  Oh, I haven't even started.  So we start talking and at some point, she starts talking about her exhusband, and then about her failed marriage.  Next thing I know, she's sitting on her kitchen floor crying.
  Me:  Wow.  So.... that did she bring you home for?
  Dave:  I asked her that at some point.  All I could do was stand there.  I couldn't leave.  I didn't know where I was, and I'm sure it wouldn't have been good for a black man to be walking around some weird area at 2 in the morning.
  Me:  Right.
  Dave:  So I decided to sleep on the couch.  At some point, she tried to come up and lay next to me.  The couch wasn't that big, so I subtly pushed her off.
  Me:  (laughs).  Ouch.
  Dave:  As soon a the sun came up, I was out of there.  She had two kids, a 15-year old, and a 9-year old.  I decided that would be to awkward.  There was no one on the street at all.  Just me.  I probably walked for half an hour before I found a cab.  Then it cost me 20 Pounds (approx $40) to get back to the hotel.

  
  

  Then he asked me about my story, and I told him how he sucked as a team player, and left too late in the night.  Later, we would talk about how he dressed:

  
  

  Dave:  I think you were right about this jacket.  It might be a cougar magnet.  I mean, first there was the one in the red dress. 
  Me:  I'm still pissed at you about that one.
  Dave:  Then there was the one from the party. Also, at one point, the girl I was with went to the bathroom, and as soon as she was out of sight, I was surrounded by 3 other cougars, and one just grabbed me and started kissing me.
  Me:  It's the way you dressed.  I told you.
  Dave:  You might be right.  I think that jacket might be a cougar magnet.
  Me:  Could be.
  Dave:  I'm going to have to lock it in a trunk when I get home.
  Me:  Yeah, but you know that when some cougar walks by your apartment, you're going to hear the box start shaking all of a sudden.
  Dave:  Like in Jumanji.

  
  

   Black 6, out.

  • 1:07 pm
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