February 16, 2008
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Why I don’t leave voice mail when I call
I don’t make a lot of phone calls, and even then, there are only a few people that I call, and in no specific order. Technically, it’s in first name, alphabetical, because that’s how my phone stores it. The only people that get done out of order are those who I have specific reasons to talk to, or may have some priority in my life (no one really has that right now).
One of the times when I can almost be assured to make calls is on a long drive, such as between PA and NYC, or any similar drive or time where there is little that I can do other than talk. Unfortunately, some people never answer their phone (e.g. Heather and Jane), and my call eventually goes to voice mail, something I despise, since I really have no message to leave. If I do leave one, it’s pretty generic, and speeds up once I approach the finish line:
“Hey… It’s Pat. Just calling to say hi, and see how you are doing… I’ll be stuck in my car for teh next two hours, so feel free to give me a call. AlrightTalkToYouLaterBye(click).”
I actually stopped leaving this message for the aforementioned people, (because it’s not like it does anything) and I generally won’t do it unless I actually expect a call back. However, I managed to screw this up the other day, while calling a friend. Let me just give it to you as it unfolds:
“Hey, it’s me. Just calling to see how your test went. Well, I’ll be on teh road for teh next two hours, and them I’m going to bed, and then to work. Talk to you later. Bye.” I then hang up the phone, or so I thought.
Now, I’m sitting in my car, staring at the terrible traffic that’s sitting in front of me, and all I can think of is the idea of ballistic eradication of the vehicles in front of me. And I yell out:
“JEEEESUS, GUIDE MY BULLETS!!” (a reference to Joe Rogan’s stand-up routine).
“If you would like to hear your message, Press 1.”
I guess that I didn’t hang up. And I think I hear the item that I have to press to re-record my message, so I press 2.
“After the beep, begin adding to your message.” I think I’m creating more message, rather than a new one, but I decide to just say the message again. When it gets to the end, I press # which brings up the menu, and then I choose to replay the message. I listen, and think I’m in the clear, but I’m not too sure, because the messages are basically the same. Then I stop talking in the recording, and I think I’m good. And then…
“JEEEESUS, GUIDE MY BULLETS!!” and the second message starts. Not wanting to hear it all, I press the # key and then
“Message delivered.”
What?! Noooooo!
Black 6, out
Comments (3)
LOL! Hilarious stuff..it’s happened to us all. That’s why I “try” not to multi-task while driving. Good post!
It doesn’t pay.
I’ve done it as a sort of part-time job, but pay usually comes in the form of sex. Just kidding. Beer.