January 16, 2008

• Straight to Second Base

  This entry deals with an adult topic, and yet remains juvenile at the same time.  Go figure.

  Speaking to one of my friends (who will remain nameless) a few days ago, an interesting conversation arose about her boyfriend.  They are pretty open about talking about their past.  Anyway, at some point, the conversation came up about before he was with her, and apparently, on a night out, he got stuck with this one girl.  Now, he’s a boob man.  When asked what happened, you can all guess what he decided to play with.  However, when she said, “so,you made out with her and then did that?” he said that he didn’t even kiss her or anything.

  The guy went straight to second base!!  What’s worse is that it worked!!!  I mean, imagine if you were watching a baseball game, and when someone hit the ball, they ran straight to second.  Like, over the pitcher’s mound and stuff.  Like the pitcher screamed “Oh, shit!” and jumped out of the way.  And then imagine that the umpire said that he was safe. 

  That’s like getting the “Pass Go, collect $200″ card from the community chest in Monopoly.

  There are men who have different skills.  Some guys are “breakers” meaning that they are good at going into a group of women, and having them all accept him.  Some are wingmen, which means that they help their buddy out well.  There are a whole bunch of skills out there, but I have never heard of a “straight to second” guy.

  Black 6, out.

  • 3:14 am
  • 1 Comment